Category Archives: rant

Boston Walking Distances

I’ve been making several jaunts around the city for the past 30 days since I got here. Generally speaking, you can easily cover a lot of distance around town if you know where you are going.

If you are walking from Northeastern towards Fenway Park, you must realize that there is a pretty decent sized green area called Fenway that could fuck you up along the way. Basically the big thing on one side of it is the Museum of Fine Arts and the big thing on the other side is Fenway Park. If you are near the Museum, keep walking until you get to the outer edge of park, make a turn, and keep walking straight ahead until you get to what is called Landmark Center (a big ass art deco building). Along the way you should pass Simmons College and Emmanuel College. Once you get to Landmark, keep heading straight down Brookline Avenue and you’ll end up very close to Fenway Park. You’ll have to take a right down Landsdowne or Yawkey…the choice is yours. The walk is about 20-25 minutes which is really nothing in the grand scheme of things.

If you are walking from Northeastern to Boston Common, you shouldn’t run into any problems. It’s about a 25-35 minute walk down Huntington, Columbus, or Tremont. If you walk down Huntington, you are going to have to change direction a little bit and travel up Boylston because Huntington stops near the Convention Center. I think Columbus is faster and more convenient than Tremont, but Tremont is a pretty fun walk because it’s a bit less “urban” in the sense that there are more antiquated small housing residences. Once you get to the Common you can keep walking straight past the Financial District and Faneuil Hall until you get to the North End.

There’s really not much going on Northwest of the Common. There’s hospitals and old little housing units. If you head past Northeastern to the West, you’ll end up in Allston, Brookline, Newton, or some other place like that. If you keep walking past Boston University that is.

This may be of no interest to you, but if it is then cool!

JONATHAN FIRE*EATER

BEFORE THE WALKMEN EXISTED, THERE WAS A BAND CALLED JONATHAN FIRE*EATER THAT FORMED IN 1995. THEY WERE PRETTY DAMN SWEET UNTIL THEY SOLD OUT BY SIGNING TO DREAMWORKS. PUKE. THREE MEMBERS (WALTER MARTIN, HAM’S COUSIN, AND PAUL MAROON AND MATT BARRICK, THE DRUMMER) OF JFE JOINED FORCES WITH MEMBERS OF THE RECOYS TO FORM THE WALKMEN IN 2000. THE REST IS HISTORY, DAMNIT.

WATCH A YOUTUBE OF A JFE SONG HERE: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vm6ryXXq5Sw

General Observation

Here is something that’s been bugging me for years…

If I am standing next to a wall or in the corner ALONE, do not fucking ask me what’s wrong! I’m not deliberately trying to be anti-social (at least most of the time), so don’t play these fucking sympathy games with me. “Hey man, what’s the matter?” You know what’s the matter? I’m not mad or being anti-social, I’m happy. It’s when fucks you like come up to me asking what’s the matter; that’s when shit becomes “the matter.” If the situation sucks, you don’t have to fucking magnify it or put it into perspective by bothering me! “Oh, I’m just a little depressed. Been listening to a lot of Morrissey lately. What the fuck do you want me to explain to you, a stranger, my life story or something? If you are a faggot, don’t think that your games are going to work on me. If you are a girl, your games might work a little more, but you’re still being a bitch. If you are just naturally worried about other people, I’m sorry that I’ve pissed on your parade, but deal with it. AND another thing. If I respond with “nothing” that doesn’t mean you have the right to ask me again…two minutes later. Got it? All right, cool.

Beach House!

Hot damn! That’s Victoria Legrand right there of Beach House. Her and that other guy in the band recently did a Daytrotter session and I’m feeling this a lot, particularly songs like “Zebra,” which I wrote about a few days ago and now my fascination is “Walk In The Park.” Legrand’s Nico replica of a voice is pretty hot, not going to lie.

Listen to the tunes here: http://www.daytrotter.com/dt/beach-house-concert/20031020-3738208.html

Chris On…

This is a new series in which I briefly reveal my main views on various issues/topics. So, here’s Chris on

Welfare: In a perfect world there will be no welfare and the wealth will be perfectly distributed and everyone will contribute something positive to society. Well, we’re not quite there yet haha. Many people need it and then many others take advantage of the system, so I understand why most people have a big beef about it. Unfortunately, folks don’t see the real enemy; we should be more infuriated at the government for stealing our hard earned money and funding mass murder, oil thirsty, campaigns amonst other heinous crimes against humanity. Also, Americans never mention corporate welfare, which needs to be cut immediately as Ralph Nader declared. Most likely they are unaware of the greatest “welfare cheats,” the major corporations perhaps because the corporate media will not report it.

G.G. Allin: He was a vile, John Wayne Gacey wannabe, loser. He was the man you love to hate, with good reason. Musically, the songs were average to below average, with exceptions. I enjoy the exceptions far more than some talented pussy, singer-songwriter like John Mayer, who is perhaps “better” than Jesus Christ Allin, but doesn’t give me the kicks. GG was sadistic, but in a savagely hilrarious way. Completely unique and committed to doing whatever the fuck he felt like doing at that moment, whether it be relieving himself on stage, smearing shit all over his body, and then throwing the remnants at his audience, or marrying a teenage, die hard, fan! This quality, as strange as it sounds, is incredibly admirable and it is unfortunate that he didn’t use his fearlessness in a constructive manner. Oh well, I suppose being a complete, sociopathic, meance to society is infinitely more fascinating.

Taste In Females: Well, this is for looks only and I have other tastes, but these are my strongest preferences. Dirty blonde hair, blue/green eyes, rosy red cheeks, long, pinkish/light red tonuge, tight jeans sporting a nice little butt, akin to Holden’s descriptiong of Sally Hayes’ tush at the skating rink! “Che Tits” I’ll let your mind wander on that one ahaha. I bet whatever images conjure up in your psyche is better than me explaining my deal. And how could I forget BIG BLACK BOOTS!!! :) Lord knows I have a strange fetish for this article of clothing. I actually dig other colored boots, but particularly black. When I see a good pair on some fine, young thing it’s like a beatiful whiplash! Now, inner beaty, that’s a whole other story, too complicated for just a few lines.

Chris

Great Bradford Cox Quote

Talking about album leaks:

When Lotus Plaza came out I was like a mom or something. Keeping up. The way that it went from anticipation anticipation anticipation anticipation…it’s such a sexual thing. You know what I mean it’s like they really wanted to see him with his clothes off. The album leaks like a fucking homemade sex video or something. Once the real album comes out it’s almost like yeah, I fucked her. I fucked him. I fucked that person already. When they first start getting it on they’re like “oh my God Atlas Sound is shit compared to this! Deerhunter is shit! Lotus Plaza is Deerhunter! Lotus Plaza is the essential essence of good music! Lotus Plaza is the transcendental…” The first two weeks it’s always the same. Then a week later they’re is a backlash. I’m tired of hearing about how good this is. The album isn’t even out yet! Think about In Utero: it took a year of 92/93/94 for that cycle to fully happen. There was an important day like Election Day. There’s not that anymore. People have destroyed a format of art. I have too. I’m not being Mr. Highhorse. I’m sorry for the tirade.”

Black Lips Funny

What do you do when your sixteen and in deep shit? You’re looking out at the world from the strip-mall and the detention hall, from the basement and the cul-de-sac and it just looks like there is a wall around you. Everybody tells you and your friends that you’re going nowhere, that your lives are already ruined. What the fuck do you do?

You hang around and smash stuff and get high and try to be a bad-ass, that’s what you do. You steal and drink and smash up the car your mom gave you and pull your pee-pee out in public. You work at sandwich shops and fast-food joints and try to screw private school girls because they think your tough and the girls at your school think your gay because you pretended to give your friend a blowjob at the junior prom. You fuck it all up as ugly and as dirty as you can because, why the fuck not?

Your parents and teachers and sandwich-shop supervisors look at you and think, “What happened to the kid? He has all the advantages in the world and he has chucked it all in the shitter. Doesn’t he believe in the inherent goodness of our enlightened society? Doesn’t he believe in any thing at all?”

Beach House – Zebra

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I listened to and reviewed this album for the first time back in November. Talk about an early leak! It’s among the better things that I’ve heard for 2010, but it’s a little blase, aka something bitchfuck media won’t admit! Take this song “Zebra.” You got to admit it’s pretty awesome, but at certain points I feel sort of disappointed. “Any way you run, you run before us” is simply an excellent chorus, but this song calls for some kind of loud extravagant epicness. The ending is quite solid, but in the middle it’s just all right. What do you think?

Wed. Afternoon Experience

I guess another experience was meant to be for today. This one was messed up! I was walking down the hall from my room to the elevators and I start hearing a girl make some intense moaning sounds like “Oooohhhhhhhyeahhhhhhh” and “Aaaaaahhhhhhhh.” It was obviously coming from a nearby room. I know for a fact that these screams of joy were too “perfect” to be some kind of real time experience. First of all, the girl making these sounds was too rhythmic. She’d start and stop at a fluid rate. There wasn’t any other noise coming from the room besides these hollers. At any rate, I’m standing by the elevators for a good two minutes until I see another girl walking my way. The ‘background music’ is still going on so I’m just standing there mad awkward. I really wanted to laugh because it was pretty damn blatant unless you’re deaf. Thankfully, the elevator came like 15 seconds later and that was that. Whoever did this has a pretty great sense of humor, playing a porno to make it weird for all the innocent fucks going to the elevator. Who does that? The kid’s a master at his craft. He made it just right so if anyone wanted to walk over to see where the sounds were coming from, they’d instantly be creepy as fuck. I’m pretty sure he was in the room adjacent to the elevators so he could’ve looked through the peep hole to see if anyone was approaching. Maybe I’m completely off base and there literally was some kind of sexual encounter going on and those involved didn’t give a shit at all about anyone OR somebody didn’t realize exactly how loud things were.