Category Archives: humor
Sex. Explicit Hunx T-Shirt
NOT SAFE FOR WORK…BUT WHO READS KLYAM AT WORK ANYWAY?

Speaking of Hunx and His Punx…I was bored and made a Wikipedia page for the band. The band is noteworthy as fuck so I don’t want the asshole who deleted my Box Elders article to go ape shit on this one too. Dickhead.
Funny Image of the Day
IZ SPORTS-RELATED

STOLEN FROM GERMFAUX
DO U GE TIT?
CD Review: Plastic Beach [2010]

Band: Gorillaz
Release: 3/2010
Label: Virgin
1. “Orchestral Intro” – C-
2. “Welcome…” – C-
3. “White Flag” – B-
4. “Rhinestone Eyes” – B
5. “Stylo” – C+
6. “Superfast Jellyfish” – B
7. “Empire Ants” – C+
8. “Glitter Freeze” – B-
9. “Some Kind of Nature” – C+
10. “On Melancholy Hill” – B
11. “Broken” – C+
12. “Sweepstakes” – C-
13. “Plastic Beach” – B-
14. “To Binge” – B+
15. “Cloud of Unknowing” – C-
16. “Pirate Jet” – C
Comments: Good beats/average rap. That’s approximately what this record amounts to. This isn’t a traditional rap record…obviously. Lou Reed singing over a hip-hop beat? Fail. So even if “Gorillaz are real,” they are still a pretty laughable band. Getting somewhat big names to feature on tracks doesn’t prove to positively affect the record. The theme of the record is pretty lame, something you would expect from a fictional cartoon band. Miracle Johan did “To Binge” better on his Hawaiian mix released a few years ago. At the end of the day, this is a pretty unspectacular record in the grand scheme of 2010 releases. It will be forgotten. It’s already been forgotten.
Grade: C+ (78)
Subversive Book Club Review: We Are Everywhere

Author: Jerry Rubin
Full Title: We Are Everywhere
Year: 1971
Grade: A-
Why Subversive?/Comments:
The Yippie Master takes us on another visceral journey into the everyday life of a 1960s, Amerikan Revolutionary. Written, while serving a setence in Cook County Jail, WAE reveals the highs and lows of said lifestyle: Riots, conspiracy trials, police brutality, being spied/wiretapped, stoned, LSD, Molotov Cocktails. In fact, the book is dedicated to the Weather Undeground and Rubin discusses them quite a bit, amongst other Revolutionary heroes and heroines, including the Black Panthers, Dave Dellinger, the Women’s Liberation Movement, John Sinclair, Timothy Leary and more. Though this work of incendiary material is quite subversive and colorful (figuratively and literally; filled with pictures and most pages are green, purple, etc) it lacks the zaniness and “shit in the middle of a bank” attitude of it’s predescessor, Do iT!, to an extent. Sure, compared to most books, it’s far more out there, but placed side by side with other Yippie works, it’s far more serious and not as humorous or wacky. I speculate this is for two reasons. For one, Rubin, by his own words, matured… a little bit. He abandoned his machoism and homophobia. In Do iT!, he made cracks about gays and ignored women’s role in the movement/revolution. In WAE, this is not the case, hence there are no photos of naked Revolutionary hunnies, he even condemns the phrase, “getting a piece of ass.” Secondly, the times got worse, with more governmental repression, that called for more militance. People were going to jail for longer sentences (Bobby Seale, John Sinclair, etc) good folks were being assasinated (Fred Hampton), and many were forced underground or into exile (Timothy Leary, Eldridge Cleaver, The Weathermen, etc). The FBI was cracking down on dissidents, like no other time before, they even had many spies, whom posed as activists for years, thus causing distrust amongst eveyone. The government attempted to use psychological warfare to destroy the movement from within. They failed, but it still left many devastated and often fucked up their lives. Therefore, Rubin’s book is not as happy as one would expect. Though, don’t misconstrue me, it’s still quite amusing and inspirational, if incredily outdated (it’s actually outta print!) At one point, Jerry and folk singer, Phil Ochs visit Charlie Manson in prison and “rap”- Revolutionary chat- with him for hours. Go figure. All in all, this serves as a fantastic statement against corrupt and boring Amerika and instead for the creation of a better, more humane society.
Chris
The Leprechaun Gazette
March 17, 1997
There was a leprechaun named Patrick he was a cheerful man. Every day in Ireland he saw a rainbow with pot of gold. People said where is the pot of gold. Patrick always thought there was a pot of gold. People said there is no pot of gold but there is a rainbow. One day he ment a little girl Melanie she was crying. Patrick said what’s wrong. Melanie said I ran away from my home and I miss my parnets thats why I am crying. And I have no food. Patrick gave Melanie some bread that was in his pocket. Than Melanie said there are my parnets and she stoped crying. Her parnets said thank you very much. Patrick said no plombe I love kids. Melanie’s mom said is that a pot of gold I see. They said wow! Patrick said I was right there is a pot of gold. Patrick walked back to his house and everybody said you were right there is a pot of gold. Patrick got the gold and share it with everbody in his town. Everybody loved Patrick. People called him St. Patrick because he said there was gold. From that day on because of Patrick we have a St. Patrick’s day.
The end.
Funny Pic of the Day
I actually stumbled upon this one myself.

Beavis and Butthead On Fake Plastic Trees
Classic
Chris
Classic Album Review: At Action Park

Artist: Shellac (of North America!)
Full Title: At Action Park
Year: 1994
Label: Touch and Go
Grade: A
Tracks:
1) My Black Ass– 10, Open up a can of whip (black) ass!2) Pull the Cup- 7
3) The Admiral- 8/9
4) Crow– 9
5) Song of the Minerals– 9
6) A Minute– 9
7) The Idea of North- 8
8) Dog and Pony Show– 9
9) Boche’s Dick– 9
10) Il Porno Star– 9
Comments: Steve Albini is Killing Me Slowly with His Songs! At Action Park delivers a full blast of audio assault and yet it’s so soothing to my ears. Albini and crew whip you with their guitars, so brutal you are wetting yourself in Kim Gordan’s panties. But, it aint rape man ahaha, it’s a fucking fix! Most artists I adore are very pop like in nature. With Albini, it’s a whole other kitten to tackle. The Albini “sound” is heavily guitar driven, mean fucking guitars complemented by pounding drums (“Crow” is a great example of this). The record opens with the beloved, fan favorite, “My Black Ass,” an immensely catchy number and one of the best guitar riffs in all of Rock music. There’s a spectacular groove that just rolls through your headphones and slides down your skin; it feels better than sex… ok, I have no authority to say that :( but, it will one day feel better than sex :). This groove thang is commonplace throughout AAP, but is best exemplified in the closing track, “Il Porno Star,” which highlights one of Albini’s greatest talents: Dark, strangely humorous, and often malevolent lyrics. Albini shouts, “Porno Star Arrives… No English… No Money.” Go Figure. Overall, I highly recommend this classic to all Albini fanatics and newbies as well. If you don’t like it, you can kiss MY (BLACK) ASS!
Chris
King Khan BBQ Show In AE
Go to your nearest American Eagle (or just take my word for it) and you might just hear The King Khan & BBQ Show. Take a look:

Don’t be mistaken for genius on part of the corporation, though. Radio K, the radio station of University of Minnesota, won some competition that allows them to have their customized play-list looping throughout all stores in the USA for a select time period. Other great bands that you might hear if you go into an American Eagle (why the fuck would you in the first place?) are Atlas Sound, Deerhunter, Girls, Handsome Furs, Julian Casablancas, MGMT, Peter Bjorn and John, Phoenix, Shout Out Louds, Thee Oh Sees, The War on Drugs, Thurston Moore, and Yo La Tengo. Typical college radio.