Ausmuteants @ Barack’s Barracks WED OCT 1!

Tomorrow – or today – or yesterday – depending on when you are looking at this. Hopefully, sometime before 7 PM on Wednesday, October 1. ‘Cuz that’s when Australia’s Ausmuteants are playing at Barack’s Barracks in Boston, Massachusetts!! Courtesy of our show-throwing pals B.O.W. SHOWS and with Phantom Rides and Longings.

I feel like I’ve seen Ausmuteants and I did, of course, virtually at GONER FEST where they absolutely ran through a nutty set. I was really feelin’ it, this is gonna cap off an insane couple a weeks for us KLYAMers – Ty, Black Lips, King Khan and BBQ, and now Ausmuteants. The Aussies are newer to the game, but they got the hard-hitting synth/guitar punk jams – one of the best bands in the world per the trustworthy Bobby Hussy designation and I agree there.

 

    “FELIX TRIED TO KILL HIMSELF”

 

Review: Robot Death Kites @ Neverland (7/11/14)

RDK

“You’d like us if you were in Junior High.” These words appear on Robot Death Kites’ bandcamp page. I’m thinking… yeah, I would totally dig these dudes if I heard them in Junior High. Their music is extremely angst fueled and like so many of my peers I was pissed off all the time. Bullies, asshole teachers, gym class, math I dunno you get my point. Times sucked and I used music as an outlet to get through all that hideous shit. Robot Death Kites sing about bigger bullies and assholes. Evil corporations, sycophant yuppies, and Starbucks fiends. Depraved souls.

These fellers hail from Brooklyn, New York and I first heard of em’ two years ago when I too was roaming the street of Brooklyn, hungry. Seriously though, that wasn’t just a cute metaphorical phrasing. I actually was hungry, I hadn’t eaten in hours and it was around dinnertime; I was in town for a Nobunny show.

So waltzing down some lonely street in Brooklyn I bumped into a man in a chicken suit wearing boxing gloves. He led me to an odd, little restaurant known as Mama Joy’s. Long story short, the chicken turned out to be Dylan aka Snuggles. We bonded over tales of Gay Gardens shows and mutual tastes in music. He revealed himself as the bassist for this here band Rainbow Dream Kittens better known as the mighty ROBOT DEATH KITES.

Now, that brings us to the present day. Robot Death Kites are back in Boston and they’ve brought a tape with them – Yuppie Nightmare – their latest and greatest effort. The recordings are crisp and cool. You may catch yourself dancing along to the music at home alone, giving your junk the old plunk, the old one, two tug. Smash a few holes in the wall, empty another case of PBR. But, that’s not as fun as seeing these ruffians in the flesh dangling in front of you and more than likely resting their sweaty skin on top of your wee body.

Before the set begins vocals guy Otis aka Sunshine runs outside to rally the troops and round up as many men, women, and children as he can. About twenty or less bodies are present before Otis, Jon aka Artichoke (guitar), and Vinny aka Booboo (drums) rip through their set.

Robot Death Kite is pure spectacle. Otis is dressed in his mum’s Sunday best, a real top notch black number (he eventually slimes down to his skivvies), holding a red telephone as his microphone. Dylan’s face is covered in a set of fine pantyhose. Scrumptious. Don’t be misconstrued now. These guys have the guns to back up the glamour and they fire off a string of skull cracking tunes that gets the small, but enthusiastic crowd all riled up and ready to blow off some steam.

These miscreants really do put on a fun show. Their songs are angry and angst ridden, but the performance is anything but; if anything it’s an excuse to go ballistic, like you needed one, right?  It’s Atlantic Thrills meets Guerilla Toss meets Rage Against The Machine if they were a basement band. Speaking of which, a basement is the perfect place to see Robot Death Kites, I can’t imagine it any other way. There’s just something about knocking back two PBRs and clutching your third in the midst of a mosh pit, whilst a convulsing Dylan Death Kite leans back and shreds his guitar in the middle of the pit on the cold basement floor.

Definitely a must see. We’ll have to get these fine, upstanding gentlemen back in Boston again sometime soon. It’s a pleasure to finally meet some of you dudes and bring home a few bruises in the process. Fuck it, you don’t want to leave this world without any scars.

LISTEN UP: http://robotdeathkites.bandcamp.com/

Does anyone have any videos from this enchanted evening? I’d love to see them. Give the dumbasses that didn’t attend a chance to see what they missed out on. Ahh well, here’s a vid from Boston Hassle of the band’s set at Gay Gardens (RIP) the last time they were here. Enjoy.

 

 

GONERFEST 11 Streaming On Rocket Science Audio

New Back Pages “Various” Out Now

Our man Back Pages is back with you rightly guessed it – another new EP! The Orlando lone teen shredder’s Various is a mix of three acoustic recordings and one with the full band. In fact, these guys opened for NOTS last month and check on that video footage if you haven’t.

And there are Back Pages compilation tapes – Singles 13 – available on our do-worthy label KLYAM Records. That’s a lotta Back Pages, just how we like it.

 

Music Video: Cretin Stompers – “Adult Child”


Yo! Check out the new music video for Cretin Stompers’ “Adult Child” off their full-length LP Looking Forward To Being Attacked. The video is directed by Joslyn Crocco and it’s pretty nuts, may cause seizures. You’ve been warned. They weren’t foolin’ when they said they were stomping and attacking.
Listen to the whole album here: http://cretinstompers.bandcamp.com/album/looking-forward-to-being-attacked

Review: The Growlers, The Garden @ Brighton Music Hall (9/14/14)

By Joanna Trachtenberg

This was my 3rd time seeing The Growlers in the last 2 years. The opener, The Garden, I’d heard of but wasn’t familiar with their music. They are a duo that consists of two twin brothers from So Cal. They started with a few short punchy punk songs. Then about midway through their set I saw the singer/guitarist put down his guitar and the drummer got up from his throne. I was thinking “They couldn’t be done so soon. They were only on for about 10 minutes.” Then I saw one of the guys press some buttons and a drum machine turned on. They both started rapping and it turned into a hip-hop show. I was not expecting to see 2 skinny guys rapping at a Growlers show. After a few minutes of that they got back to their regular instruments and the short punchy punk tunes continued. Their punk songs almost reminded me of a less aggressive version of The Hussy (who are also a duo).

Right before The Growlers took the stage a drag queen dressed in stereotypical Asian dress came out and started singing and dancing to the crowd. Some of the songs that played when she was out there were “Jet Boy Jet Girl” by The New York Dolls and “Homosapien” by Pete Shelley. At first it made me wonder if Brooks Nielsen had a new career, but once she started singing I knew it wasn’t him. After about a 10 minute performance the drag queen introduced The Growlers. The stage was decked in Chinese style fans and dragon heads in honor of their new album Chinese Fountain. The best part about seeing The Growlers live besides their music is watching Brooks do his funny little dancing. For some songs he was dancing with the drag queen and then he pushed her in to the crowd so she could crowdsurf. I didn’t recognize Brooks right away without a mustache. I personally think that mustaches should be mandatory for any members of The Growlers. Their set lasted a little over 90 minutes. Sorry but I don’t remember the actual setlist because I didn’t write it down but I know they did a bunch of new songs. The crowd seemed to get most excited towards the end when they did One Million Lovers and Someday. After the show when the bandmembers went off stage I could see one of The Growlers (I think it was Anthony) moon the crowd. They have been great everytime I have seen them and I am hoping for their thereafter walkabout.

Review: Cumstain, Free Pizza, Gangbang Gordon (Tape Release), White Pages @ JP Drive In (8/24/14)

Cumstain Boston
Flyer by Christine Moore
Bands: Free Pizza, Cumstain, Gangbang Gordon, White Pages
Date: Sunday, August 24, 2014
Venue: JP Drive In (Jamaica Plain, MA)

FUCK YESSS! Cumstain in Boston! We’ve been huge Cumstain fans for the last four years, so this is truly a triumphant day in KLYAM history. A dear diary moment indeed. I had visions of seeing the band play in a dank, crowded basement and NOW for once my fantasies have cum true!

White Pages – White Pages kick the show in the balls with a BANG. Not my favorite garage rawk band around these parts, but they fit in well with the crew tonight; fast, sloppy, out of tune punk rock. Songs are over before you even knew they began. I wish they were a little bit more distinctive, but I appreciate the ramshackle. I also get a kick out of the band’s self deprecating attitude. “You couldn’t possibly hate us as much as we hate ourselves.” Haha. http://whitepages.bandcamp.com/

Gangbang Gordon – Shit, if you thought White Pages were nutty then you’re in for a shocker. If the name alone didn’t scare you away (which it shouldn’t), brace yourself for America’s greatest cultural train wreck, GANGBANG GORDON! Culturally Irrevelerent that is. That’s GBG’s tape (out now on BUFU Records) and this is his tape release show. Did you get all that?

Gordon and his fellow gangbangers, which includes a rockin’ Sydney Kinchen on tambourine, are all squeegied together in a tight spot in the basement. This is their first haus show and honestly the best I’ve seen from the group. Not just hoppin’ on the Gangbang train, it’s the best I’ve seen. The sound is smoother, it’s a teeny bit more melodic, and the bangers just feel more at home. For one thing, the vocals are clearer than ever, though I also recognize most of the lyrics, since I’ve watched these little puppies (the songs) grow practically since their inception.

I think they open with “Malt Shop,” a pill poppin’ popper. It’s outsider noise, but there’s also some slamming, traditional punk rock to it. Some of the songs have solid, catchy, head bobbin’ inducing riffs to them (“Life At The ABC,” “I Can Testify,” and “Slide Paper”), but then sometimes those riffs get lost in the madness. I know this is a gangbang, but I’d prefer it if they had more rehearsals. Like they all gang up on a teddy bear or two the night before.

It’s okay though, as I said this is my favorite set from the dudes. When GBG/Gordon/Gangbang/Ted Bundy/ G Spin It/Max Hardcore/GG Gordon Allin/ GG Gordon Liddy/Gangbang Gordon Marshall JK plops into the crowd resting his guitar against his JP Drive By vicdumbs he serenades them with each guitar stroke, giving all their GF’s strokes in the process. They eat up each JP Lick he has to offer.

Cheers buddy, let’s see you and your minions do it again in another rusty basement near you and me and other kids like us in a theater near you and perhaps me, but closer to you. http://gbgordon.bandcamp.com/

Cumstain – WHA WHA WHATTT??? WHAT’S THEIR NAME?!! Chill out bro, it’s cool, EVERYBODY CUMS. In fact, that should be the name of a children’s book: Everybody Cums. From the creators of Everybody Poops…. We’ll teach them while they’re young so we don’t have to deal with all of their PC whining when they grow old. Wipe away all that self-righteous shame in its infancy.

Seriously though, I’m getting the chills. I’ve waited for this for so long. The band opens with White People Problems (2012) classic “I Ain’t Wrong.” Hot dog, we have a weiner. We also hear some newish cuts such as “Dahmer Blues (Gimme Head),” my Grandmother’s favorite Cumstain song. She used to shotgun six busch lights with Jeffrey Dahmer every morning. She’s a trooper.

For the first half of the set, the crowd is kind of swaying about, nodding along, you know politely rockin’ out or whatever that noise is. Erin and Sean then introduce one of Cumstain’s finest tunes “Bachelor’s Life” (from 2010’s Hurry Up and Kill Yourself You Scumbug, Trust Me Your Mother Won’t Miss You) as a song a certain someone (HINT: Expletive Gore Dan) might enjoy… and that sets the crowd off as it oughta. What a banger!

The crowd’s sauced and rowdy, boppin’ and sloppin’ to and fro. The band climaxes with their eponymous #1 hit “Cumstain” (2010) and I hear some folks giggle as Sean sings “I just want to fuck you.”  But, that’s not enough. The people want more. They demand sloppy seconds and we get an encore with “Broke My Dick” (2010) and the bodies keep slamming some more, culminating in a 40 shattering to pieces. It’s just another malt liquor stain on your floor.

A HUGE HUGE HUGE HUGE thanks to Cumstain for playing this show on their tour. It was amazing to finally meet Sean and Erin. Boston loves you, pretty please cum back soon!!!

LISTEN!: http://cumstain.bandcamp.com/

Free Pizza – The moshing continues and barely stops for a breather. The crowd goes particularly apeshit during the local rock anthem “Boston, MA.” Surely, it is one of those songs I wish could go on for two hours, if you’re just feeling it. The lyrics center around the happenings of young musicians and music lovers and pretty much anyone else depending on how you take it “living in Boston, Massachusetts.” My favorite line is “chill with the dead in the cemetery.” The dead. Grateful Dead. Haha, I always picture Jesus, Santiago, and Nick chilling with the Grateful Dead in a cemetery when I hear that line. Perhaps their jamming together. Perhaps.

Go see these guys live. There’s no excuse not to, one of the best around town and they play all the time. http://freepizzarocks.bandcamp.com/

THANKS TO ALL THE BANDS THAT PLAYED, BOSTON HASSLE/BODIES OF WATER SHOWS, BUFU RECORDS, AND EVERYONE THAT CAME OUT TO THE SHOW OR WANTED TO!

Don’t leave before checking out this sick vid of Cumstain from the show shot by our dear friend Mr. Melody Matters!

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